Saturday, January 27, 200710:20 PM♥
A woman who never put airs of any kind, her whole happiness lay in seeing her children grow up in good health and she was willing to do any amount of work to achieve that goal.
that's the kind of mother she is; i cant imagine any other kind that i would rather have.
though my mum dont wake me up,
dont pay my bills,
dont walk me home at late nights,
dont shelter me home when i had no umbrella,
dont ask me "why?" when i had puffy eyes,
dont drive me to school even when im late,
she still keeps the true feminity.
that's the kind of mother she is; i cant imagine any other kind that i would rather have.
though my mum dont wake me up,
dont pay my bills,
dont walk me home at late nights,
dont shelter me home when i had no umbrella,
dont ask me "why?" when i had puffy eyes,
dont drive me to school even when im late,
she still keeps the true feminity.
without her, no distinctive family atmosphere will be created..
there would be no one to give expressions of a motherly love.
without her, daddy wont have his status and we children will be nowhere.
she is a very simple woman without any education but she has succeeded in many ways...
it pleases me to think that, my mum's life is indeed a victorious one.
she didnt seem to have any special ambitions.. and i can never remember her saying a single word that would stop us in working towards our own goals/ ambitions.
there would be no one to give expressions of a motherly love.
without her, daddy wont have his status and we children will be nowhere.
she is a very simple woman without any education but she has succeeded in many ways...
it pleases me to think that, my mum's life is indeed a victorious one.
she didnt seem to have any special ambitions.. and i can never remember her saying a single word that would stop us in working towards our own goals/ ambitions.
When i failed my o levels, i didnt know how to brace myself up.
i couldnt face my mother at all. Sight of her expressions accompanied with great disappointments would sadden me more.upon reaching home late at night, i saw the lights of the living room still on. there she was, sitting down without the tv on. i knew that she wants to speak to me. . .
i just sat there, looking so purposeless. i stared in the blank, i didnt utter a single word.
she said that she didnt mind me having that kind of results. she knew that i tried hard enough, especially for maths. she added on in mandarin, " even if u face difficulties like that, u shouldnt escape by coming home late, and not returning my calls. i know u have been walking alone cos' thats what u alwys do when u face sadness, but u must remember, u stil have papa and myself. ok, now that u have received your results, no matter what u still have to move on. why not just retake? dont worry about how others think. "
i said, " i dont want to go back to hong kah, i have no face to do so. i dont want to go to regent, i have many friends there. " ( i was an express student. its no surprise to be egotistical. Having to fail my o level results was a great fall for me)
She continued, " no matter what, dont give up, now go and sleep and think of where u want to retake your o levels. i will help u."
upon hearing that, i rushed up to my room and cried badly. i wondered what was in her heart at that time. she didnt scold me, neither did she show any disappointments. What most i didnt expect was, the next day, she actually went down on her own to regent sec and talked to the principal... she wanted the school to take me in, just so that i could retake my o. but later on, she realised that no matter what she do, i wouldnt go to any government schools. Finally, we decided to enroll into a private sch, chec. father asked someone else to take over his job, mother got all my documents ready... they followed me to the sch to register. i was very touched then.. it became obvious that i was the only one with my parents there. everybody else did their registration on their own. for the next few weeks, dad and mum were there to show their support. they didnt want me to be alone. that moment will be one i will never forget.
then now, people may ask why am i in shatec instead of polys? again, with the support of my parents. my mum knows that i love tourism and nursing.. i could go into nursing but not tourism. cop for tourism in tp was 13. with my l1r4 results, its an impossible. then again, she told me to try out shatec. i asked, " but i failed my o the first time round, now if i go to shatec, wouldnt it be a waste ?" she then replied, " what waste? honestly, your first round of results cant even get u into shatec... and u must remember, this is a changing point of your life, where u have to really think about your future. just do what u like. its not a matter of can or cannot anymore. "
i said, " i dont want to go back to hong kah, i have no face to do so. i dont want to go to regent, i have many friends there. " ( i was an express student. its no surprise to be egotistical. Having to fail my o level results was a great fall for me)
She continued, " no matter what, dont give up, now go and sleep and think of where u want to retake your o levels. i will help u."
upon hearing that, i rushed up to my room and cried badly. i wondered what was in her heart at that time. she didnt scold me, neither did she show any disappointments. What most i didnt expect was, the next day, she actually went down on her own to regent sec and talked to the principal... she wanted the school to take me in, just so that i could retake my o. but later on, she realised that no matter what she do, i wouldnt go to any government schools. Finally, we decided to enroll into a private sch, chec. father asked someone else to take over his job, mother got all my documents ready... they followed me to the sch to register. i was very touched then.. it became obvious that i was the only one with my parents there. everybody else did their registration on their own. for the next few weeks, dad and mum were there to show their support. they didnt want me to be alone. that moment will be one i will never forget.
then now, people may ask why am i in shatec instead of polys? again, with the support of my parents. my mum knows that i love tourism and nursing.. i could go into nursing but not tourism. cop for tourism in tp was 13. with my l1r4 results, its an impossible. then again, she told me to try out shatec. i asked, " but i failed my o the first time round, now if i go to shatec, wouldnt it be a waste ?" she then replied, " what waste? honestly, your first round of results cant even get u into shatec... and u must remember, this is a changing point of your life, where u have to really think about your future. just do what u like. its not a matter of can or cannot anymore. "
im more than glad that my parents are the decision-makers in my life. on many occasions, they dont bother much about me, just cos' they want me to be independent. but when problems are met, we come together and make decisions together. the support of theirs will walk me through my life.
behind each of us is the love of an infinite number of mothers, mothers who wish for nothing more than we do, their children, live good lives..the health of the family and so many more..
" u have daddy and me no matter what. " in that one sentence, which she would repeat over and over again, i could sense the boundless tenderness of a mother's love. thinking of what my mother has meant for me, i alwys feel sorry for children who have lost their mothers.their whole childhood must be darkened by the loss in ways that it is impossible to measure.
behind each of us is the love of an infinite number of mothers, mothers who wish for nothing more than we do, their children, live good lives..the health of the family and so many more..
" u have daddy and me no matter what. " in that one sentence, which she would repeat over and over again, i could sense the boundless tenderness of a mother's love. thinking of what my mother has meant for me, i alwys feel sorry for children who have lost their mothers.their whole childhood must be darkened by the loss in ways that it is impossible to measure.
Monday, January 22, 20079:53 PM♥
" now adays in this society, it wont be easy for you to get yourself a bf, cos' u have to face the fact, u're short".
OHHHHHH NOOOOOOOO! not again?
everything got to do with height.
i swallowed hard.
9:20 PM♥
still remembered vividly..
went abroad, and i naively thought it was the best time to settle my thoughts, and to make the right decisions.
the decision was " To stay". So there i thought, everything would be fine once im back to singapore.
all we needed was time.
nevertheless, it was one sided all along.
i returned to spore only to find out that, he had a liking for someone else.
that someone else was a friend of mine..
after so long..so much for trying to build up the relationship..
how nice to return with the answer "to stay", but only to realise that he had strayed...
so now, i have learnt this...
Don't stay because you think "it will get better." You'll be mad at
yourself a year later for staying when things are not better or wont get any better even if time permits.
so i was that fool.. waited and waited....for the day for him to realise i want nothing but him to become himself, the better self again... i played a role of a guy in the relationship.
what exactly do i want to say?
a 3 year relationship can be nothing after all.
it can also be something u can learn from.
as much as we get hurt in our relationships,
time can heal all wounds.
i didnt believe.. i dared not move on. but look, 1 year later, im here again, sharing the past again.
u will never understand this if u never even try..
To my friends having a hard time in relationships..
like i said, words cant prove any. no hugs, no flowers, no diamond rings can cure.. the only help is yourself.
time again is what u need..
u will find yourself grow along with time.. who knows.. u will even laugh over the past.
we are all young. be brave.. this is how we should live our lives.
after all, it is their hurt that allow us to finally learn how to love others now.
to you,
the one who lied so much,
the one who probably didnt care,
the one who didnt know how to love,
the one who betrayed too many times,
the one who took EVERYTHING for granted,
the one who strayed to the other side and can still have the guts to say, " i love u only".
thank you. ive become twice stronger because of you. :)
2:07 AM♥
WHERE'S SUPERMAN!?
Thursday, January 18, 200712:14 AM♥
the class didnt make it any better.
the issue of CTIS swells my head. it is supposed to be an event for us to enjoy.
decisions on where to hold the bbq is getting no where.
the war between the east and the west.
trust me, its getting out of hand. come on folks, too serious.
so the east prefer to hold the bbq at the east,
the west prefer to hold it at the west.
common/ practical.
since we were asked to vote, majority should win isnt it?
sadly, this dont work for dtm 06.
we raised our hands, and obviously the west got more votes.
then...
" not fair what!.. east side people alwys travel down to sch..! then why cant u all sacrifice abit travel down to the east seh? " commented by someone staying in the WEST.
so a few came telling me.. "eh jaws, funny huh.. they think what.. the school has been built here what. and they are the ones who chose to come here to study.. now what.."
i wanted to stay neutral.
not until i pondered hard..
its true.. east side people are having a hard time.. they need to travel far/early everyday..
wake up when the moon is still there, and probably reach home when the moon is out.
but hey, this WAS THE CHOICE YOU PEOPLE MADE. since u wanted to come to shatec, then no complains about the location please. its not as though SHATEC WAS AT PASIR RIS, and now moved to bukit batok.
the very first day u step into shatec, u had stepped into bukit batok st 22.
and if u know that having to travel so far is no more than trouble to u, then shouldnt u think thrice before signing up for shatec?
yes, NOW WHAT?
so does this mean that the west side people have the rights to make noise about having the trouble and inconvenience to travel down to CHANGI AIRPORT everytime we need to FLY?
or try saying this to the staff at the airport. " sorry lah, i stay in the west leh.. so far.. thats why late lo.."
if u like to complain about such slight issues, then u gon' suffer almost forever, esp here, in singapore.
i dont mind travelling down to the east. but will that shut your mouths?
my conclusion is, the bbq should be taken place in central of singapore.
my conclusion is, NEXT TIME DONT ASK TO VOTE. cos when we vote, the minority go against the majority.. and somehow somewhere somethere, the course tutor will be put into a difficult position..
so in the end, NO DECISION MADE. time-wasting isnt it?
my conclusion is, can the east not be unhappy with the west and vice versa? ( hello, sch not busy enough? )
my conclusion is, if its so difficult, lets all visit the orphanage then.
yaya, if only i have a say.
happy now?
man.. this is so embarrassing.. singaporeans ourselves having the kind of dispute over east and west.
havent u learnt that "you cant please everyone in this world?"
Tuesday, January 16, 200712:00 AM♥
with tremendous debt of heartfelt gratitude, love and more love, i wish you girls, mainly FAZA WENDY & YUSHAN !
A very HAPPY BIRTHDAY!
i look forward to seeing all of you along the way as this wonderful journey continues..
to faza ~ your talent is undeniable, nothing short of awe-inspiring. . the stories u shared were unforgettable.. u have been strong. please remain. and if my life of shatec are chapters of a novel, u will definitely be in the first. 2.5 are no longer figures to me. they mean quality, and friendship. i love you.
to wendy ~ u played a role in my turning point of life. so how can i not remember you? from chec days to chingay days, u were with me. u may seem just another simple girl out there, but to me, your kind of character contrary to others. strong, determined, and understanding. perhaps without you, i wouldnt have come this far. i really appreciate all that you have done. with my deepest sincerity, a million thanks..
to yushan ~ didnt manage to meet up with u. still, i hope there will be more chances to come. it has been a pleasure knowing you & family. dont let this go just like this.. im saying this because i dont want to lose anybody who come across my life.. greedy?
again,
when i count my blessings, i count u girls twice.
Sunday, January 14, 200711:57 PM♥
what else can i ask for?
promise u mum..
that when ive got my license, we need not queue for cabs anymore.
i will drive you around, wherever u wish to go to.
i will be that gd lil girl..
human traffic caused much trouble..
taking the cab so many times made me feel nauseous.
bumping into used-to-be- sch-belle turned anorexia patient saddened me.
now, feeling so worhtless and sleepy...
thomas how many camels my habibi...? says:
if u're tired go slp now.. tmr after the proj meeting they go home already i stay behind help u with the lochness
i went speechless.. i mean, this may be his job as my group member..
but after a long exhausting week, someone actually come and say, " if u're tired, go slp now.."
then, came tri.. who said the same thing too..
its my fortune to have them as friends, now, as my group members.
and how many members will volunteer themselves to stay behind to help out?
thanks habibi. :)
tishabi ala kher everyone..
(good night)
Friday, January 12, 200711:25 PM♥
well, ure away... (msn status)
just wanted to tell u, ure someone very special to me.
samm ★ says:
i dont wanna close my eyes, i dont wanna fall asleep cos id miss you jaws
and i dont wanna miss a thing
cos even if i dream of you, the sweetest dream will never do
and, this k guy. he managed to make me laugh..
speaking of the rainy weather.. he told me..
ĦSho-HondoĦ - outpuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. says:
singa POUR
ĦSho-HondoĦ - outpuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. says:
and u know rain
ĦSho-HondoĦ - outpuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. says:
he coming to concert
ĦSho-HondoĦ - outpuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut. says:
but he came earlier
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Faredz's msg moved me. i continued to wonder with intense regularity, how many a times do people actually have the guts to show their appreciation to another? yea,count your fingers..
though he may be someone whom i dont speak too often with, he still rememebered.
faredz, as i look back my life, i saw your footprints. :)
samm, sorry for the disappointments. to be honest, it wasnt nice to see you so down.. im sorry.
just remember, your feelings are mine too. i will be your listening ear as long as u want me to be...
open house for you girls on monday. look forward!
lamer king, that was good! :> thanks.
---------------------------------------------------------------------
alright, daddy is away with his sworn brothers. one of 'em won the PBM award and so, daddy's ticket and accomodation is paid for..but dont envy, because, he is doing that for entertaining purposes. further more, mum is not by his side.
so bro, mum & myself were having dinner... then dad called! (erm, its his first day abroad only)
dad asked for mum.. and they exchanged words. mum smiled...
when she ended the call, i asked about dad.
she said, "your dad heard about the heavy rain in spore, the flood..and he asked if we are alright."
i said," ask about you only lar.. dont need shy with me lar u.."
she then smiled again and *blushed*.
if only i could speak to dad..
we then continued to talk about daddy. bro said dad must have missed mum so badly as this is the first time he went alone without her companion. of course, i mean, after their marriage. dont be silly.
sometimes i really admire their strong marriage.
monday, they would attend parties together at the hotels, if any.
tuesday, work together.
wednesday, stroll outside verde crescent. and take hours to be back.
thursday, stroll again.
friday, hit the shopping malls if time allow. sometimes, malaysia.
saturday, u will finally see us children with them.. at night, lounge at the hotel.
sunday, work together. at night, family time.
though at times, they do argue, but still, they make it through..
they make important decisions together, share their ideas together, fight their problems together,
and not forgetting, lecturing us together.
now 48, daddy still surprises 44 year old mum with his "chasing mum" tactics..
in recent years, they just cant get enough of each other.. and u can find them travelling around the world..
WITHOUT US. russia is their target this june. stil planning.
their respect, trust, understanding and love got them this far..
and so are my respect, trust, understanding and love for them.
and if i were to tell all the stories about them,
i could already kill years or so..
its still happening everyday.
best couple of 'em all...
7:54 AM♥
and i mean almost everyday.
sleeps at 3am, somtimes later, and rises at 6am.
even saturdays and sundays.
when im hungry at night, i live with bread and milk.
i have no red bulls to keep me up..so,
i take chocolate bars,(something which i obviously dislike).
im not sure how i should feel....
so many problems, so lil time.
i need my superman.
dialled a wrong number yesterday..
me: hello cherry! where the hell are u?!
a guy: huh? cherry? i strawberry some more ar..
me: oh my.. sorry..wrong number.
seconds later, he msged me.
the guy: can we be friends?
i didnt reply.
the guy: come on lar... dial wrong number also can be friends.
then, he started calling many times.
this is really ridiculous.
i had enough of him ..thus i replied, " I AM MARRIED, AND HAVE 2 CHILDREN. 42 YEARS OLD THIS YEAR. CANT YOU HEAR THROUGH MY VOICE?"
and then, i never did hear from him again.
Thursday, January 11, 20072:14 AM♥
Wednesday, January 10, 20077:00 PM♥
5th feb- hospitality sales progress test.
13th feb- tourism geography progress test and english proj presentation.
14th feb- Principles of accounts progress test.
16th feb- quality service in hospitality progress test.
7th mar- hospitality sales proj presentation.
13th mar- tourism geography proj presentation.
16th mar- quality service in hospitality proj presentation. report to be handed in by 5pm.
26th mar onwards- EXAM WEEK.
progress test meaning our kind of CA1/ CA2 when we were all little.
its as though, we need not study or do self revisions.
by the way, we do not know the deadline for our poa proj/ assignment deadline yet..
someone, pls pity us.
so how can i dance? how can i continue to pursue my diploma in piano performance/ teaching ? how to date? :p
6:45 PM♥
objective:
To enable students to evaluate quality service practices among different service providers in singapore, using quality service concepts discussed in class.
project brief:
visit any of the service provider (f&b outlets, retail, attractions etc) and analyse the service encounter from the point of first contact to the end of the experiences. create scenarios that allow you to fully explore quality service concepts. ( to be honest, it just means, to be nasty. to create "trouble" for them).
ok the following part is funny..
remember:
create situations that your group can manage, and do not bring any embarrassment to SHATEC! for this matter, you must rehearse sufficiently beforehand and members must be briefed, so that they know exactly their rolse and what they are supposed to do or look out for, as customers. please do NOT wear sch uniforms during your visit.
fun?
trust me, it isnt that fun anymore when u have to do the report of at least 1500 words, also an oral presentation about the visit. it is also not very nice to be nasty on purpose or get recognised by the service staff.
Monday, January 08, 20074:53 PM♥
then tri surprised us with the food he brought back from vietnam! glutinous rice.. from north and south.
pictures taken using samsung e870.
as always said, its the thoughts that count.. for the whole month he was there but he never did forget us.
he is one great friend we wont ever want to part with. thanks ho chi minh tri.
personally, i also want to take this opportunity to thank those who had encouraged me for my maths.. i was an f9 student. now, an A. thanks tri especially. For coming early and going back late. Also to terence.. u helped me when i was in doubt. not forgettin' eugene, though u may not see this.. you texted me the night before our maths paper.. it was very encouragin'. thank you for that.
ok, soon, im going to step down my role as a class rep. i guess, i had done my part. whether good or not, i tried at least. from borrowing neckpiece (for females), ties ( for males), name tags ( for both), to helping our classmates to eliminate their demerit points, and to voice out for them..
i just want to say, it has been my pleasure to help.. but, never take that for granted as, its time to be independent. im not sure who will be our next elected class rep but do give mercy.. :) and hereby, i apologise for any wrongdoings.. for those who didnt appreciate, its time to learn. its clearly not a class rep job to do all the above mentioned for u. in fact, it is our job to mark u late even if its a second. everything starts from YOU.
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about tourism geography project : (just to share)
project objective :
- to apply the concepts of selling a destination
- to research and present to the audience the knowledge gained in tourism geography.
background information:
your team will take on the role of the national tourism organisation of a european country. you are selling your country as a destination to the travel agents in singapore.
requirements:
you are to prepare and conduct an infromation and persuasive multi-media presentation of between 20-25 mins long. all members must be present.
you should include :
- an intro to the country you are presenting (eg. geographic location, political situation, population, culture, etc.)
- places of interest that can be found in the country ( a minimum of 4 places of interests applies).
THE COUNTRY MY GROUP will be working on : UNITED KINGDOM.
group mates: tri,eugene, thomas, kian, terence ! ok all males. for you guys, i will wear pants!
i look forward to working together with all of u. showcase the different fields of talents u have.. and then,
LET'S BRING IT ON!
to samm, sam, joyce.. anything in doubt, do look for us. :)
my monday is good so far.. how about yours?
Saturday, January 06, 20076:38 PM♥
justin, is his name. He is my third youngest paternal side cousin.
justin on our swing..
kids like him do admire fishes u know? well, i didnt.
"jie jie, i really like your house" he said..
sweet...
alright, he is super super adorable. a fast learner too.. i WHISPERED," dumb dumb likes to eat gum gum". i swear i didnt want him to learn that... but he remembered that.. and....went to his mum... "dumb dumb likes to eat gum gum" he said that while lookin' at me.. i smiled.
he smiled.
his mum smiled.
my mum, grinned at me.
thanks ar justin.
2:04 PM♥
ok habibi, subjects for the new sem :
- English Compre (weightage - 2)
- Hospitality Sales (weightage - 3)
- Microecons (weightage - 2)
- Principles of account (weightage - 3)
- Quality Service in hospitality (weightage - 2)
- Tourism Geography (weightage - 3)
see? there isnt any subject which is at weightage 1 this sem. and, we will be expecting lots of projects, because as seen on the timetable, there is a slot especially for projectwork. in 3 months time, we must complete our projects, 6 progress tests, 6 final exams. this is crazy. shit that too. :(
younger bro turns 16 this year. cant seem to fathom him at all. o level boy still playing dota everyday. ive watched my male friends play dota before.. say it so that i dont understand the fun of the game.. all i see/ hear is "time to go!, time to go!" or "MOOOONNNNNSSSSTTTTEEEEEEEEEEERRR KILLING! HuhuhuhhahahahaHAAA" . this is call youth? spending all your time meant for studies to do monster killing? further more, its O LEVELS. ive been through it twice. and i thought im the best example for him to-not-to-follow-my-footsteps.. in case u want to help him by sayin' that playin' dota can be a kind of break in between studies.. i can tell u, he is doing the other way round. studyin' is the break in between his games. duh.
2:16 AM♥
its saturday already. which also means, 2 more days of happiness.I DECLARE the start of the war soon... this year, no more long vacations. no more 4 weeks of break. NOT AT ALL for 2007.the longest vacation will be for 2 weeks. arrrgggh, shit that. this also means that i cant work...feel so useless.
any dtm-mer kind enough to let me know what subjects we are havin' for the new sem? (by email/sms pls) and, ive misplaced the timetable too.. *hint. yayaya, all i know is sch starts 830am instead of 11am on the first day. who changed that? DARING. they cant wait to see us..? eeks.
now, let us all curse and swear first.. i wont do it out loud.
Friday, January 05, 200712:46 PM♥
Buy and sell you
Terrorise you
Mass destruct you
Flaunt you
Disconnect you
Cluster fuck you
We will crush you ]
nice lyrics.
and by the way, here are some instant turn-offs, at least for me.
A: hello, where are you? doing?
me: hello, why?
A: oh nothing lar, i just thought i saw you. someone looks like you. so what are u doing? can call and talk?
B: hi joce, are u very busy outside?
me: no,why?
B: oh, i thought i saw someone like you..
me: u sure did. cos' thats not me. im at home.
B: so can i ask u out? since u are at home.
C: hey, u at jurong east?
me: nah, DONT TELL ME YOU SEE ME. u always say that.
C: ya, i thought i did. haha.in the end i guess its another person. so free to come out?
D: hey, where are you?
me: home.
D: i thhought i saw you.
me: at? where are you now?
D: home lo.
me: huh!? a minute ago, u said u saw me.........
D: oh, i mean i just reach home..free to meet up?
can try harder? or something new?
im getting sick of these poor pick up lines. sometimes, being straightforward is best. ive heard of those too many times.. so, SOOOO many people look like me? but i thought u were also the ones who went, " i think u are really different from others.away from height, your looks.."
aiya, im not that stuck-up. dont have to round about the forest and oceans, afraid of getting bite.
then, i received this call from someone...
he said: eh? u pick up my call... shen qi (amazing) leh.. so free ar today?
me: oh, just now free, now that u call, im not free, so byebye.... haha. no lar..whats up?
he: i ask u ar... erm.. valentines day u free?
me: huh!? today what date? (self-checked too)
he: 4th jan lo. why leh?
me: hello, i never get the chance to celebrate valentines day but, i know its on the 14th right? 14 of FEB.
he: ya ya ya. i know. but, want to be the first to ask u ma..
me: wait.. EHHH. i THOUGHT U GOT GF?
he: break up le..
me: when?
he: just yesterday lo.. so can call u today ma.
me: (in my heart i went: wthwtf!@#$%^&*(()_+{}:"<> ) oh, sorry to hear that. but, i wont be free on valentines. i know i wont be free. anyway, i need to do my things, get back to u some other time. sorry.
wa lao, is he not good at words or what?
" just yesterday lo.. so can call you today ma."
perfect statement.
also,many times, guys get away with givin' flowers, chocolates... but these dont work for me. yes i do fancy the flowers, but not the chocolates at all. as alwys said and commonly used, females go for the heart. so do i.
honesty and trust is a must-have. so is this why im still alone? *laughs.
-you dont have to be rich to be my guy.-
Wednesday, January 03, 200710:44 PM♥
friend chensu asked me to head down to tbsc (telok blangah) with her. . felt that i had a long gd sleep in the bus though it was only for about 10 mins , i realised. So now, im all in for sd (student division) anniversary show. under special group committee. whereby we will design & print the tickets, set a theme/slogan for the show, design the souvenirs, along with any other special programmes for the opening of the show. given this task, i felt challenged. this also means, i will be going down to tbsc every week. its gon be a struggle.. as, the subjects of my new semester in shatec will be a hell lot more complicating/busy than what i have been doing. projects will be expected. BUT, its gon' be a struggle which i can overcome. im all set for it.
that's for my accomplishments.
side-track a lil..
many a times, i faltered due to the inertia to pick up my loss of confidence. i probably cannot do anything about being short, and even if i skip the ropes, there wont be alot of differences. it has been livin' in the genes of my family. the other day, i was at vivocity.. the mall itself is already spacious enough.. the crowd there looked as though they were ants fightin' a war.. the more i lost my confidence.. the whole world seemed to be crushin' me down, the people all looked tall, (yes,because im short) thus overpowerin' me. i felt small.
so why that inferiority?
- people (be it friends or relatives) always say, " ya u know why? cos' u're short. "
- even if they dont mean it, they still tease.
- uses the words like, "vertically challenged" or "small size" or "little", as if they are a totally different meaning compared to "SHORT".
- alwys mistaken as a 12 year old girl.
- have difficulties reaching the top shelves. (ya la, u laugh. i see how much u have to bend down to the ground to pick your money up.)
hello, u call a handicapped a "physically challenged" but at the end of the day, they still mean the same. just that they are phrased in a nicer way. please dont tell me, its not. because, according to dictionary.com (the place u will be directed to if wrong password is entered when coming in here), vertically challenged means : –noun (used as a euphemism) short in stature. comprehend that?
sometimes, it doesnt mean that everything is ok when i keep that smile on. even when im teased, i can still smile along with u. but somehow, deep down, it doesnt feel good at all. i mean, how will u feel when the somethin' in u cannot be altered, yet people still emphasizes on it? also, it isnt nice for anyone to joke around with me about my height, even though ive accepted the dull fact. how do u feel exactly if u were short and i shout across the town, "hey dwarf! u still so short ar!? " (of cos, this has yet to happen to me.i hope it never will.) And, how do u feel if u were obviously poor but people ask," $500 only leh! why and how come cannot afford?! u sooo poor meh? my piggy bank in my drawer already $5000 ".also, how will u feel if u were a mute and your friends tell u, " oh ya ar, i forgot u are not deaf. u are just a mute". maybe, u cant feel, cos u arent in any of the categories stated above. still, can i ask this favour from you people to have that lil humanity in yourselves? try not to tease directly in the face of one. u want, u all can hold hands, go to the back and gossip..
we all live once. why not accept it and see it as a kind of beauty instead of imperfection? for this, im also telling myself to accept every human kind...
thanks jane for pickin' me up when i felt so small..